Better Than Wine
Building up and supporting marriages has always been a part of the long-term vision for Dandelion. We have had many chances to do that one-on-one with couples these past four years hosting them here in Long Island or meeting with them online, but we have always wanted to be able to minister to larger groups through weekend conferences as well. We are excited and grateful that the Lord has begun opening up this door for us. Last month we had the great privilege to lead our new “Better Than Wine” Marriage Conference at Renewal Church in Memphis, TN. It was a wonderful weekend.
Song of Solomon 1:2 served as the inspiration for our title, “Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth! For your love is better than wine…” We used Song of Solomon as the backbone for our four talks. The titles for each are:
Tasting Intimacy
Ministry of Reconciliation
Breakdown of Intimacy
Deeper Intimacy
We wanted to highlight the reality that the intimacy the Lord gives us in marriage, especially intimacy that comes as a result of walking through forgiveness together, far surpasses the various other things we may turn to for comfort in life. Wine is still very apropos today, but you could put many other things in there too…shopping, Netflix, food, porn, video games, endless scrolling through Tik Tok, etc. Whatever substitute for actual human interaction you use to cope.
Granted, this was/is specifically a marriage conference, but many of the principles still apply to all forms of deep relationship. In fact, even though Song of Solomon has sex very explicitly in view quite a bit, we spent the majority of the conference talking about how intimacy is really built through communication. In marriage, sex is always a fruit or result of deep connection between two people, which happens outside of the bedroom. As one of our marriage counselors loved to say, “Problems in the bedroom are sorted out in the living room.”
In our culture it is very commonly thought that the opposite is true. We think sex is the foundation for compatibility and intimacy. We want to start in the bedroom, then build from there. But that is putting the cart before the horse. Active and reflective listening is key to displaying to your communication partner that you hear them, value them, and understand them. Understanding makes it easy to find common ground.
Out of the comfort we received, we share His comfort for you in your marriage.
If you are interested in hosting The Better Than Wine Conference at your church or in your area: